Closed Paths

[rekindledtitan]

Blaze hasn’t been around the Plaza much of late, keeping her Nexus visits to brisk strolls through less well-protected areas. Areas she’s less likely to run into familiar faces. But today the Exo Guardian teleports straight in, the signs of recent battle marring her armor as she pulls off her helm and looks around. After a moment, she exchanges a glance with the tiny silver bot floating at her side, then strides over and parks herself on the nearest sturdy bench.

“Ever feel like you’ve learned more than you could have imagined and still wound up right back where you started?” It’s the first frustrated question that comes to mind. She shakes her head at it.

“Never mind. How do you ground yourself when you need to get your head straight?”

That's an easy one. She has an abundance of questions today, and to her unease most of them aren’t ones she feels free to share.

Comments

[chiron_survivor]

Adia is visibly startled when the armored figure appears in the Nexus. She relaxes slightly when Blaze removes her helm, and even seems inclined to answer her first question, but waits until she's done talking to actually reply.

"I come here, if I can. If not, I stargaze. Something about all the little lights in the sky makes me feel less adrift."

[rekindledtitan]

Maybe it's the easing of her posture or the brightening of her optics, but the robot's attitude seems to soften at that answer. Her orange gaze flicks over the young woman as Blaze nods to her.

"You come here?" Her voice sounds human aside from the soft synthetic edge; there's plenty of room for curiosity in it. "Never really thought of this place as a grounding influence."

[chiron_survivor]

"Yes," Adia answers sincerely, albeit with a slight hesitation. She seems a little unnerved once she has Blaze's full attention. "Or at least a Nexus very much like this one. My home is... well, it's a long story, but we're under enemy occupation currently and it's very stressful. The Nexus is a respite from that."

[rekindledtitan]

The light in her optics narrows again at that, though from her tone it's mainly concern. A hint of anger, but that's not directed at Adia. Mention something like that and she's all duty again.

"Sorry to hear it. What kind of enemies are they? Are your people holding up all right? ...Uh. If you don't mind talking about it here." She did just say it's her refuge, after all. And it sounds like a long-term situation. Maybe the young woman isn't looking for outside intervention, but a Guardian can't not ask.

[chiron_survivor]

Adia looks away, twists and untwists the ends of her violet scarf, the only color on her otherwise dingy outfit. "Sentient robots," she says finally, apologetic, concerned that she'll make Blaze uncomfortable with her answer. "I, um, I don't mind talking about it, though. We're -- the humans are doing okay. They aren't trying to kill us anymore." Not all at once, anyway.

[pathfromdarknesstogrey]

"I'm on two ends of the spectrum, as it depends on the situation at hand, meditation, or a good sparring match usually clears things up mentally for me." This comes from the familiar presence of the local Exiled Sith, Dia, who's in more gray robes as opposed to the usual black.

"But to answer the first question, I've had a number of experiences like that--dare I ask about yours, or is it private?"

[rekindledtitan]

"Good to see you, Starfall." She sounds like she means it. Though Blaze seems to be watching her reactions a little more closely than usual. "I've been trying the combat option for the last couple weeks. Just doesn't seem like it's working as well lately."

Which all ties into the other question, and... hey, maybe Dia could understand her position better than a lot of organic people. Blaze remembers encountering the ex-Sith during that strange time shift (albeit through unfamiliar eyes). If the change in wardrobe means as much as it would from a Guardian, seems like Dia remembers some things too.

She gestures, inviting Dia to join her on the bench. "It's personal, but maybe you're the person to ask. Seems to me you'd know a few things about having a complicated history... and starting over from it."

[pathfromdarknesstogrey]

"Usually if one doesn't work, I make the attempt at the other, and if both don't work, well." She shrugs. At that point it's either solve the problem, or just do your best to ignore it. Although she doesn't say this part aloud so much as live it implied.

As it stands, though, shrug aside, Dia's movements and reactions belay anything but what's on the surface, her stance has her weight mostly on one leg, arms folded low and hood down despite the different, lighter (both in make and color) outfit. But it's still that cool, controlled attitude that the exiled Sith tends to exude, with a clear edge of curiosity on her face.

Still, the fact that Blaze was willing to confide in her was interesting (and somewhat new), so she stepped over, settling down next to her and looking up at her curious. "I believe it's as they say on some worlds, you're 'preaching to the choir'?"

Dia, on the other hand, has no idea the young woman she met some weeks ago was a younger form of Blaze. People come and go in the Nexus all the time, so she's merely marked it off as simply one of those chance encounters that happens so often. "But, yes. Bloody overcomplicated history to start with," she waved a dismissive, leather gloved hand as she crossed her legs underneath the kilt of the robe.

That said, her clothing only means she's more relaxed and a little less closed off, simply for the fact that she's not wearing her more concealing robes. Although the gray's still a little muted, and would easily blend into most crowds and the like easily enough, should the Assassin still want to vanish quickly. And she's still got the lightsaber, although it's in two pieces and on the back of her belt, rather than at her hip, making it much less obvious.

"Starting over is never easy," she explains, first, "And in my experience all you can do it conquer it one day and one step at the time. Accept each victory as it comes, regardless of how small or insignificant it may seem."

[rekindledtitan]

"Heh. I've never exactly been the meditative type." She comes close to it sometimes, when she's working on her gear, but Blaze doesn't count that.

She shifts her position to face Dia a little more, leaning on one knee and listening. They may not be all that close but despite her background and the powers she's dealt in, Blaze's own experience gives her no reason to mistrust Dia. Besides, when you have about three years' worth of memory, nobody's that old a friend.

"Yeah." The Exo seems to be turning the words over in her mind for a moment before she speaks. "I guess the difference is, I don't know exactly what I'm starting over from. Must have a few centuries of history behind me, but I don't remember anything before I woke up as a Guardian. Not for sure, anyway. You'd figure that would make it easy, but- heh. Turns out my slate wasn't as clean as I thought.

"So- did you just walk away from everything you used to be? What if you learn it- was something a long way from what you assumed?"

[pathfromdarknesstogrey]

"You didn't really strike me as one, to be honest." Dia admits with another shrug, leaning back and resting her hands on her crossed knees.

"But not knowing what you're starting from likely has problems of its own, but I can't say I've experienced those. I've pretty much known where I've come from for... a long time now." It's difficult to gauge the years, sometimes. Especially since it's complicated, and everything blurs together after a while.

"As for walking away, it's not nearly as easy as it sounds. It's been a few years, and I can still fall into old bloody habits far too easily for my liking." She brings her hand up to tap her lower lip with her gloved index finger in thought. "But in the case of learning something was different than what I assumed--I'd look for conformation. Data and information that marks this information as real and believable, because I'd have my doubts. At least, initially."

[juststeverogers]

Steve also has kept his distance from the Nexus Plaza for the most part, preferring to keep to himself for the last few weeks. not that he hasn't been busy. There's the usual workload he has to sustain himself to do obviously.

There may also be a spot downtown he's been spending a lot of time at in the last couple of weeks too. Just in case, One can never be too careful. He's on his way back to his apartment when he spots Blaze and Ghost, shield strapped to his back. It makes him look even smaller than he already is but Steve seems to carry it easily.

"I usually flip through my old sketchbooks. When I need to be reminded to stay strong." He raises his hand in a simple greeting to both the Exo and Ghost. "You're both looking good."

[rekindledtitan]

The Titan always brightens up when she sees her friends. And Steve is one of the best. But this time she seems to check herself just as she's lifting a hand in return. She peering at him carefully to mark his reactions. It almost looks like she's... embarrassed? Ghost looks at her for a moment, then darts over to scan Steve and peep at what he has on his back.

"Yeah? Uh, thanks. I'm just... glad to be myself." It feels impossibly awkward, speaking of her time as Bryn. She's still trying to come to terms with what happened - what it apparently means - and being Blaze, her strategies for doing so haven't been great.

She rubs at one antenna, trying to decide what to say. She should have gone and talked to Steve earlier. If she hadn't been burying herself in distractions.

"I owe you thanks," is what she goes with suddenly. "For helping... us. Ghost. I'm grateful he wasn't alone."

[juststeverogers]

Steve understands why she's a bit awkward, and does his best to not make things worse as he approaches. Ghost gets a warm smile and the smallest of taps, like a mini pat in way of greeting, from Steve.

"Glad to have you back." Steve shrugs his shoulders as if to convey that it isn't a big deal, that he doesn't think of her any differently now than he had before. "It was a bit sad thinking you'd forgotten me, even though we got along alright." And hey, they even got into a scrap together. That's always fun, right?

"You know I'm here for the both of you. If I were in trouble, I know you'd both be there for me too."

[rekindledtitan]

"We've got your back any time," Blaze is eager to agree. "Just say the word, Steve."

She's starting to relax, the more normally he behaves. He and Bryn got along just fine from the latter's memories, but he sounds glad to see her back. That's more reassuring than she wants to admit.

"Besides, now I've seen you fight," she adds warmly. That's one thing she is happy to acknowledge. "So I learned something worthwhile. I knew you had the guts, but that was something else."

Whatever about her, about who she used to be - she knows better who Steve is now. That's important.

"Is that a shield? Ghost asks him, backing up to look at him.

[juststeverogers]

"I've got to get you and Ghost on speed dial, then. How fast can you get here from space?"

His tone is jovial, but Steve is already reaching into his pocket for his phone. The personal communication device is awfully handy and Steve finds himself more and more glad they were invented, even if when he'd first gotten it he'd wondered what the point was for such a thing.

"Blaze if it weren't for the nonviolence field I would always be getting into fights." Steve admits with a chuckle. "Sure got into plenty of scraps back in Brooklyn. I thought Buck would go nuts."

He looks up at Ghost with a proud smile.

"It is, yeah. Harrow had Mister Naugus make it for me. It was a birthday present."

[wreckandrule]

Blaze isn't the only one who has been missing from The Nexus, Bulkhead is finally back and he waves a big hand in her direction. "Would breaking things count? Though I'm going to need a find a new way to vent now that I don't have a war to fight no more. And I don't think the others will be too happy if I break the things I'm fixing." The tone of his voice seems a little sad.

"Maybe I'll learn how to play a guitar if someone can make me one big enough, and if I can find a teacher. But I used to like going out for a drive in the desert, Earth wasn't exactly home but it was a pretty nice place to live in," says Bulkhead, as he kneels down to try and get at eye level with Blaze.

"So what's go you feeling like you want to break something, Blaze?"

[rekindledtitan]

"Hey, Bulkhead!" It's been a while. She's glad to see him- and it doesn't hurt that he won't know about any recent... transformations she may have been through. Her younger counterpart left her the memory of a very different perspective on her friends. Not a bad perspective, by any stretch, but...

Right now it's nice to run into someone who only knows her as Blaze.

"Breaking things always counts. It'd be something special to see you play a guitar, though. I've heard people play them once in a while back home. Have to wonder how one would sound when it's bigger than I am." She chuckles, though it dies out as she considers his question.

"It's, uh. Kind of an Exo thing. I found out something about us and - keep in mind I don't even know for sure if it's true. It's nothing I can go investigate either. Doesn't answer any questions, just throws up a whole lot of new ones. I guess it's got me rattled, that's all."

[wreckandrule]

"Wouldn't it, and I have to wonder if a guitar my size might do more harm than good. But maybe I'll just try finding some good music with lots of guitar in it instead." Bulkhead laughs at the thought of the trouble he might get into if he literally brings down the house when he strikes the first cord at full volume.

He stops laughing when she answers his question. "Ah, the complicated stuff of legends stuff." Bulkhead nods his head in understanding. "We Cybertronians got lots of those, but I tend to leave all that stuff to guys like Prime or Ultra Magnus. And I think that's why, because every time people tend to dig that stuff up it always tends to lead to trouble or lots of rattled Bots."

"Or sometimes it might lead to rekindling a war even if it is a short lived one. But I'm all audios if you want to tell me about the exo stuff."

[rekindledtitan]

"Bulkhead, if you can weaponize a guitar I know a few Guardians who'd like to know about it." Lord Shaxx for one. It's too bad she wouldn't get to see his face if she showed him the evidence.

"No-one's starting a war over it," she assures him. The idea that his people have such revelations themselves gets her looking at the Autobot in a new light. "It's just... did your people ever dig up something that changes how you look at yourselves? That maybe you didn't start out the way you always thought?"

[wreckandrule]

"You know that's not a bad idea, weaponized guitars. But I'm just looking to see if I can remember anything Miko taught me before I got reassigned to Cybertron." Bulkhead might just wander about The Nexus later to see if he can scavenge some parts in order to make himself a guitar.

And he sighs a sigh of relief when he hears that nobody is trying to re-start any type of war. "Yup, not that I really understood the whole thing and kept out of the way. Most of the things we came across where turned into a weapon, and even for a guy who's job was to break stuff it does make you think. Is war what we're really built for?" Bulkhead isn't great for philosophical discussing, but he is going to do his best. He tilts his head down to look at the ground and grunts.

"So much for hoping for ever lasting peace, eh?" Bulkhead lifts up his head, and he looks at the Plaza. "Unless I decide to stay here for a bit."

[bestdadinamestris]

Hughes has been worried about his Exo friend lately. Ever since she was... human, she's been all but avoiding contact with everyone. Seeing her here again, even if a little battle-worn, makes him smile. He approaches with a wave of his hand and a nod to Ghost before plopping down on the bench next to her.

"You know me - my family is my rock. If I ever feel like I'm back at square one, I actually go back to it. Once I'm grounded, I can start again." A beat, and then he asks, "Think it might help if I were to show you some new photos of them?"

He's teasing, of course, but he's hoping to lighten the mood a bit before he asks what's really bothering her.

[rekindledtitan]

She nods to him when he approaches, a little stiffly. It's good to see a friend, always. But where does she even start a conversation, after the last time they met?

"Still going to pass on that, Hughes." There's a hint of good humor in her voice, but she's holding very firm there. She's got enough things screwing with her head.

"They're, uh- doing well, I hope?"

[bestdadinamestris]

"Figured as much," Hughes answers with a chuckle. He didn't actually expect her to take him up on that offer.

"They're doing very well, thanks." Part of him wants to go on and on about them for a moment, to keep the mood light a little longer, but he gets the sense that won't help. He smiles softly at his Exo friend for a moment, then flicks his gaze up to Ghost and back again. Time to get to the heart of the matter.

"Can I help with anything?"

[rekindledtitan]

Bryn might have taken him up on it; Blaze is still herself, with all the quirks that entails. Hughes may never understand it, but in her own way she's doing him a favor, ensuring her friend's family stays well out of her unpleasant subconscious.

She struggles with answering his question for a minute, then shakes her head.

"I don't know, Hughes. Just trying to figure out if any of that was real. Whether it should even matter. I can't make sense of it. Not unless you've turned up a secret dossier on Exo manufacture lying around the Nexus." She snorts. "If it was up to me I'd write it off as a Nexus trick. But it's not just about me."

[bestdadinamestris]

"I wish I had - it might help me understand what the hell happened, too." He frowns and leans back into the bench, crossing his arms in front of his chest. Blaze... Bryn was human, and was still his friend, only... not. The whole thing was so damn complicated and it had left Hughes' head spinning for days when he tried to work his way through it. Nothing had seemed to help and seeing Blaze like this now makes him feel worse for having failed.

After a minute, he shrugs slowly. "Maybe this whole thing was meant to teach you something not about where you came from, but rather about who you are." He sighs heavily. "I know it's not much to go on, but maybe being this other version of yourself was supposed to help you somehow."