nexus_crossings | Loki: Worst Matchmaker Ever?

Loki: Worst Matchmaker Ever?

Loki has a peculiar way of preparing to speak: he does not clear his throat or straighten his clothes or loosen his collar, but merely takes long, slow strides into an open spot. There are no stages in the area of the Nexus in which he finds himself, but the way he stands and opens his arms--all grace and hubris--seems to make the flat plain ground around him into his personal catwalk, the diffuse light around him his own personal spotlight.

You may not take him seriously, but you'd be hard-pressed not to notice his presence.

"Nexus, if I may bend your collective ears for a moment? I have a simple, if heartfelt, request."

~~I would like to see if my big brother is capable of feeling embarrassment.~~

"I am the younger sibling of Thor Odinson, a man--nay, a god--of great power, courage, and nobility. There are few who equal him in battle, and until now I would say few who equal him in the realm of the heart. Alas, it seems that at this time in his life, events in our world have wounded his confidence greatly. I wish to build him back up, so to speak, but my best efforts thus far have fallen flat."

"Frankly, I feel that his alteration in hairstyle, clumsy and poorly-planned though it may be, suits the peculiar shape of his head far better than his previous, doll-like golden tresses. There is a certain simplicity to his change of outfit that matches with the simplicity characteristic of his thought patterns. A change for the better, certainly, and moreover it shows his true mettle, the way he has no fear of appearing as the leader and representative of our people with his cape tattered at the hem and unmended, as if he has of late escaped from the engine of our borrowed space vessel."

"Nexus, friends, what more can I tell him to restore his pride? You will find him nearby, I think, if you wish to get a look at him, or if he finds himself too shy to observe this conversation I am certainly capable of producing images to show what he looks like. All compliments directed at him will be accepted with gratitude, and perhaps one of you will even find it in your heart to court him, however temporarily. I cannot guarantee he will be amenable, as he is so very timid of late, but I think it would do his heart well to experience a flirtation once more."

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He strides a step or two ahead after the youth stops walking, pauses, and circles back to give him a quizzical look. Granted, he's being unusually friendly right now, but he didn't expect it to put anyone in shock.

"Are you all right?" He's grinning. You're in trouble now, Peter. He's starting to like you.

"Asgardian poetry tends toward long, dramatic sagas full of plot twists and tragic deaths. Which I do enjoy, but a shorter, sharper piece with a clever rhyming scheme appeals even more."

Peter's awestruck expression is easily read as is the speed in which he drops it to nod furiously and try to straighten his spine and look cooler than he is so as not to disappoint his new friend.

"So like...Shel Silverstein? That's probably way too young for you though. But it is short, witty, and rhyming a lot of the time. They might have one of his books here."

Peter folds his arms while he glances around the place to try and figure out where the poetry hall is most likely to be. The signs scattered about aren't very easy to spot so their best bet is to do a bit of wandering while they keep their eyes peeled.

"So do you uh, do you know much about Earth pop culture and media or not so much yet?"

Loki isn't sure who Shel Silverstein is. He might actually appreciate some of his work, though. It may be aimed at children but it's not devoid of philosophy, in its way. Also, Midgardian children are interesting. Having not yet learned the graces and airs and social mores their parents have, they can be quite savage.

"Dylan Thomas," he says. "If you're looking for a human poet."

"The force that through the green fuse drives the flower
Drives my green age; that blasts the roots of trees
Is my destroyer.
And I am dumb to tell the crooked rose
My youth is bent by the same wintry fever."

There's something a little hypnotic about the way he recites, but it's brief. He's not actually trying to perform right now.

"I know a little." Here is where he should probably go ahead and disparage human culture as is expected of him, but since he's just admitted he likes some of their poetry, he'll leave off for now. "Why, is that an offer to teach me?"

Poetry and classical literature were never his specialties in the quiz bowl so Peter's left nodding along while he follows Loki through the aisles of shelves laden with books taller than either of them on all sides. He'd been scanning the spines of the books for anything of interest but Loki's recitation has had the teen's attention focused entirely on the performance, small though it was.

"Wow. I've never head that before."

Maybe MJ knows about it? He might have to ask her sometime. She's always got a book under her arm and reading in the weirdest places.

"I..I mean if you want? Mostly I wanted to try and make sure not to like crack memes or whatever and be rude since you wouldn't get it."

If you were trying to earn any more of his favor, Peter, you did good. He likes it when people hang on his every word, even if the particular words he just recited didn't originate with him. He smiles and gives a gracious half-bow, inclining his head toward the young man.

"There is something about the vocabulary and rhythm of Thomas' works that appeals to me. That particular era in Midgardian literature is interesting. Dylan Thomas, T.S. Eliot, Ezra Pound, Randall Jarrell...there is a darkness to the work, an awareness of the mortality of both the writer and the world around him."

He's better versed in this stuff than he's ever admitted to, in fact. Even Thor might be surprised to hear him talk like this. "It offers the reader awareness of the inherent emotion," he adds almost inaudibly, "without necessarily interfering with his own internal thoughts. Rage and loss safely at arm's length."

Okay, maybe time to change the subject. He shakes his head and gives Peter a wry look. "Crack memes if you like, only be prepared to explain the joke without condescension."

Which is a taller order than he knows, because memes are by their nature hard to explain, but what the hell. If he's going to live around so many humans, he may as well get used to them.

"I don't think with a face like this I'm capable of being condescending." Peter points to his own face by way of explanation because man he wishes he was cool enough to pull a Tony Stark on people but even when he tries to be a jerk it never comes out right and then he feels bad and--

It's just better for all parties involved if he sticks to being Peter Parker.

"Do you have any idea how hard it is to get taken seriously when you look like an exceptionally harried ten year old?"

"You do have something of a cherubic look," he says. "But you will age yet, I'm sure. Grow facial hair. Get tattoos or piercings or something. Whatever mortals your age prefer to do to rebel."

He's teasing, and there's a little bounce in his step as a consequence. Honestly, even at his best he can't keep from harassing people, but this is about as friendly as his harassment can be.

"One of those 'vape' things. That ought to increase your credibility." He flashes a sly, sideways smile. "But have you considered simply using the baby face to your advantage, instead?"

There's a shimmer of green-gold energy and the lean-but-tall figure dwindles until he looks...younger than ten, actually. More like seven or eight, a small pale figure with an overly serious face, doe eyes and short dark hair. Exactly what he looked like as a child. Reaching up, he grips the edge of Peter's sleeve uncertainly, like a schoolboy who's been told he has to take his guardian's hand while crossing the street.

"Oh god no, May would kill me. That is. I mean. My aunt does a lot of hard work to take care of me best she can by herself. So, I don't really want to make her freak out mroe than she already does."

And granted given the whole secretly a vigilante stalking the streets and doing Exactly what she told him not to do is a pretty good notch on his rebellious belt he thinks that's probably enough. Especially given how she hasn't thrown him out or any number of things.

"Using it to...like how?" Oh Peter, don't ask questions you're not prepared to face the consequences of. Like this, for example. The mildly old fashioned looking guy with the Wall Street hair morphing in front of your very eyes into the cutest goddamn kid Peter has ever laid eyes on in his life. And knowing, without even having to ask, that Loki could do a whole lot of awful things while wearing that face.

"Yeah but...they won't let you check out books without a guardian looking like that. Unless you're trying to make people underestimate you so you can do shit. Usually bad things at that. The world really is geared more toward adults. If something happened that was hard to believe and you tried to warn people looking like that, no one would believe you."

"Are you not my guardian, for the moment?" Well, that's weird. The tone and cadence of his speech is the same, but his voice is that of a child's, matching his appearance. Pushed to an extreme, that could be downright unsettling. "Will you read to me? Fetch books off a high shelf?"

Don't mind him, he's just being a jackass because he can. He smiles, letting go of Peter's sleeve to push his hands in his pockets. "If I tried to warn people looking like my usual self, no one would believe me, either. My reputation precedes me. But my reputation isn't the point."

"All I mean to suggest is that you consider your assets and how your opponents, whoever they may be, might react to them. You have a look of innocence, and the way you speak reinforces that. And that does not have to be a liability. If you allow your opposition to underestimate you, it gives you an edge."

Granted, he has no idea what Peter's opposition might be, or how physical and dangerous the demands of his work are. He sees a sweet-faced teenager and assumes his worst enemies are school bullies. He's a bit behind the times, and unfamiliar with Spider-Man.

Three steps ahead, and he shimmers again, returning to his previous shape.

"It has been tempting to mess with Flash's chemistry experiments more than once, I guess."

He hasn't ever done it. For every 'Penis Parker' line he gets lobbed his way most folks are inclined to just leave Peter alone and that's honestly what he'd prefer. People not giving him a second glace or forgetting he's there works out in his favor when its time to slip away because Spider-Man is needed.

"But it might get him in trouble or mess with his grades and that's not cool." None of the guy's bullying on Peter did those things. He doesn't want to be the one to escalate it. Peter gives a bit of a relieved smile to see Loki back as he should be. "I guess I"m not very good with mischief and lies. I would be just, the worst at that."

Says Spider-Man. Oh, the irony.

"Oh, his grades, the horror! I'm sure that's not on." Loki is smirking again, teasing. "I would suggest that he deserves retaliation simply for calling himself 'Flash', but I realize that may not have been his own decision. In any case, I won't be the one to tell you to commit acts of wickedness. Just to tell you how you could commit them successfully, if you so choose."

"In my opinion, there is nothing inherently wrong with a tricky and underhanded methodology. If you could save the world, or even just the lives of your classmates, by sabotaging Flash's chemistry experiments, would you not do so? Then it is only the stakes you take issue with, not the tactics. And that's not wrong at all. It's the same choice many of your heroes make, I'm sure, day after day."

"No I...I understand full well that sometimes lying is a thing you have to do. I'm just not very good at it."

Frankly it's a miracle so few people know about his hobby because in the grand scheme of thigns Peter really isn't a duplicitous mastermind. He's just gotten rather talented at being someone people overlook. He looks up sharply at the mention of heroes but has the decency to flush a bit in embarrassment before he looks away again. What gave it away, Parker? Your Iron Man teeshirt? Still, it's a relief to find what they're here for and Peter's quick to touch Loki on the arm and point down a winding aisle.

"Poetry."

"Even better. You'll learn the skill sooner or later, and by then everyone around you will know you as a bad liar, so they will never question you. 'No, if Peter were lying, we would see it all over his face.'" Loki seems so very certain about this. Maybe there was a time, long long ago, when he was known as an innocent, himself.

If so, it's been centuries ago.

It isn't a stretch to assume that a child who recognizes the villainous Loki would also be aware of the heroic Avengers. The blush is amusing, and confirms his guess, but he won't needle. He can play a bit more gently with an underage mortal than he would with an adult.

He pauses at the end of the aisle and just stands a moment, studying the stacks. Even compared to Asgard's collection, it seems immense. Maybe he was wrong. Maybe his sacrifice at the tail-end of his life was enough for him to merit this posthumous retirement. There's something dreamy and content in his smile.

"It will take a long while to read all of these," he says, with genuine pleasure.

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Loki: Worst Matchmaker Ever?

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